Canadian Pie
by Una-Blythe
Summary: A filk about "Rilla of Ingleside" to Don McClean's "American Pie"


Author's Note:  This filk is both a parody of Don McClean's "American Pie" and Weird Al Yankovic's "The Saga Begins," which is itself a parody of "American Pie".  The storyline is from L. M. Montgomery's _Rilla of Ingleside…if you haven't read it, beware—this is full of spoilers.  I am making no money from this…only a great deal of amusement._

**Canadian Pie**

A long, long time ago

I can still remember

How those games in Rainbow Valley made me smile.

But I knew if I had my chance,

I'd go to a Four Winds Dance,

And maybe Ken would talk with me a while.

But Jack Elliot made me shiver

With the tidings he delivered

Bad news on the doorstep

I couldn't take one more step.

[Spoken] _Besides, my feet hurt._

I knew that I didn't want to cry

With Mary Vance then at my side

But her words hurt me deep inside

The war my brother died.

Singing…

_Bye, bye to this Walter Blythe guy,_

_He's a writer not a fighter but he'll give it a try._

_He followed the Piper and kissed Una goodbye,_

_Saying, "This will be the day that I die."_

Faith and Jem were deep in love,

The Reverend believed in God above

Although Jem and Jerry had to go.

And when Jem kissed Faith goodbye

I tried real hard not to cry

But helped the Junior Reds, don't you know?

Well one day I saw the strangest scene—

A baby in a soup tureen;

I took him home with me,

We'd both get up at half past three.

I was playing in the concert hall

When Irene made me feel so small

She said that Walter'd heard the call,

The war my brother died.

Singing…

_Bye, bye to this Walter Blythe guy,_

_He's a writer not a fighter but he'll give it a try._

_He followed the Piper and kissed Una goodbye,_

_Saying, "This will be the day that I die."_

Now all us women are on our own,

The men have gone but we're still home

But that's not how it used to be,

When Kenneth viewed me as a queen

(How I hate this hat of green!)

And told me, "Rilla, save your lips for me."

Then I heard from Joe and Miranda

Whose hopes of marriage had been stranded

But we did it despite her dad's scowling;

Sir Wilfred wouldn't stop howling.

Norman Douglass spoke out in church

He said that pacifism wouldn't work

And made Whiskers lose his horrid smirk

The war my brother died.

Singing…

_Bye, bye to this Walter Blythe guy,_

_He's a writer not a fighter but he'll give it a try._

_He followed the Piper and kissed Una goodbye,_

_Saying, "This will be the day that I die."_

Helter skelter in a summer swelter

The boys all went to give the Kaiser what-for,

Marching and singing all their songs

Fred asked me for a parting kiss

But I told him I'd saved my lips

Though I didn't know I'd save them for so long.

Now it'd been two years since the dance at the light,

But the end was still way out of sight;

Cousin Sophia kept on croaking,

Susan's ears were smoking.

But one day while I set the table

Dog Monday was as loud as he was able

It made my mother's health unstable

The day my brother died.

Singing…

_Bye, bye to this Walter Blythe guy,_

_He's a writer not a fighter but he'll give it a try._

_He followed the Piper and kissed Una goodbye,_

_Saying, "This will be the day that I die."_

And none of us were in one place

We were scattered both by time and space

With no way for us all to meet again

"Rilla, keep faith; Rilla, be strong,

Rilla, just keep holding on,"

Was how Walter's last letter read.

And as I finished the last page

I was torn between sorrow and rage;

This man who wrote so well

Through cruel war had fell.

And as I cried throughout that night,

To give it away would be what's right

But it took with myself a fight

The war my brother died.

Singing…

_Bye, bye to this Walter Blythe guy,_

_He's a writer not a fighter but he'll give it a try._

_He followed the Piper and kissed Una goodbye,_

_Saying, "This will be the day that I die."_

I met the girl with eyes of blue

And told her of the tragic news,

Gave her the letter and sadly went away.

Then I worked at Carter Flagg's store,

Where I'd so often shopped before

Because all of his help had gone away.

And in the Glen Doc Hyde did scream,

My mother cried and Gertrude dreamed.

Then the War finally ended

Though some things couldn't be mended.

And the man on Earth that I adore,

Handsome Captain Kenneth Ford,

Came a-knockin' on my door

The war my brother died.

Singing…

_Bye, bye to this Walter Blythe guy,_

_He's a writer not a fighter but he'll give it a try._

_He followed the Piper and kissed Una goodbye,_

_Saying, "This will be the day that I die."_


End file.
